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Tuesday, December 31, 2013

It all starts with a cuppa...

RESPOND ^__^

I have never written a blog before, that said, my hope is for all who stop by and take the time to read and get something out of it. 
Be it a laugh, some insight or an idea to take with.  

There will never really be a theme, a central message here. 


My thoughts like my life are random. 
Things that jump out at me, that make me laugh, cry or shake my head will be fair game.  Strangers, friends and family members...all a source of inspiration to me. 

I have noticed that when something happens in my daily life... it makes more sense to me when I have a cuppa in my ‘me’ time, anyone who knows me, knows this. 

Something about that warm cup of tea or iced depending on my mood...seems to centre me and fuel me at the same time. 
Tea time talk has always been one of my favourite things, and more when my son is practising his violin in the background.

A group of people sitting around drinking coffee, tea and shooting the shit can lead to some amazing discussions. 
Interactive. 
Bring yourself to the table and I will always sit and chat with you. 

Life happens. 


Work, family, friends...ups and downs laughter and tears. 

People surprise you, piss you off and sometimes make you shake your head. 

Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans.  

I can't wait to get your respond more in future. 


"A good writer speaks to him or herself as the primary audience. A great writer uses language to reach out to a be heard by the "other." 
A gifted writer reveals the truth that there is no "other.""

Namaste



Monday, December 30, 2013

What do you choose?

( •_•)
\) (> 
/ \ Everyone sees what you appear to be, but few will see and experience what you really are. 
The Soul is the same in all people and living creatures; although the body and experiences are different. 
Choose to see or not to see, you will always have that choice.

What do you choose?




Each New Year heralds in many new changes; it’s the one thing we can always be certain of. However these changes great and small and the impact it will have on you will depend on the changes you choose to make within your being.

What do you choose?

“When we change on the inside we suddenly experience all kinds of reasons to be in the right place at the right time to express the change on the outside”. 

Change what’s inside to change what’s outside and you will soon find yourself attracted to new things and new people who suddenly come into your life and new places, you stumbled into which lead to the advances you seek. 

What do you choose?

May this be the year you take back your life in ways you never thought possible. 
This is your year…Now!

ps/smoh

Sunday, December 29, 2013

IS THIS IT?

“So this is it? So what”, said a man bluntly at the beginning of one of my recent meetings.

As we began exploring together it became clear that he had long understood the notion of Wholeness, that life is truly undivided, but deep in his heart he still felt separate, still felt isolated, yearning for a deeper connection with others, with life, longing for love, longing to come alive, longing to come home. 


The anger, irritation and resentment he felt was for a lifetime of seeking, a lifetime of spiritual paths, books, videos, teachers, practices, and a lifetime spent craving some great epiphany, some permanent transcendent experience which frustratingly continued to elude him.

But what if what we long for doesn't need to look a certain way doesn't need to be attained, developed or cultivated? 

What if the anger, irritation and resentment, the frustration, worry and anxiety are all equally as valid an expression of life as the peace, joy and bliss? 
What if it's the very looking for some special state, for some extra add-on to life that continually blinds us from the sheer obviousness of it all?

When we no longer try to deny, escape from or reach for anything, we find ourselves here, with nowhere left to turn. 

The invitation then is to feel whatever arises, feel the boredom, the disease, the fear, the discomfort; it's in that absolute opening to life that the real miracle takes place. 

Life absorbs us into its arms, and in that total embrace, that merging, all the seeming divisions dissolve away; in our human vulnerability we discover our invulnerability, in our human limitations we discover our infinitude.

Then our sense of vulnerability no longer need be resisted or denied, for who we really are has nothing to fear. 


Does the sky fear the crack of thunder and stroke of lightening of a passing storm? 
Does the screen fear whatever scene of horror its pixels give expression to? 

Then Wholeness, this Knowing beyond understanding, is no longer an idea or belief, no longer something that the one at the front of the room who seems to have all the answers has got that we need to get, but it becomes ours, our own lived reality.

We are our experience: every sound, colour and texture, everything and everyone, black/white, rich/poor, Christian, Catholic, Jew, Muslim, gay/straight, genius/fool, every colour, every creed, the achievements and the setbacks, the delight and the heartbreaks, the certainties and gnawing doubts, and yes even the very misunderstanding that we are exclusively contained inside a body of flesh and bone, along with all the defensive patterns and behaviours which that belief engenders! 


This is not a mistake, a universal error, but yet another expression emerging out of our endless creativity, and so too of course, in true dualistic fashion, is this message of freedom, releasing us from that inhibiting belief!

All is ourselves, our primal, original nature, shape shifting into a myriad of seeming forms, characters and circumstances, a cocktail of emotion and sensation creating this rich play of experience in all its tragicomic splendour, every scene, every entrance and every exit of this masterpiece of drama that is life.

And what wonders unfold as this understanding deepens and matures: in seeing that there really is no autonomous controller, no one to negotiate with life, that the deal has already been done, all is forgiven.


Forgiveness for a lifetime of beating oneself up for not being good enough, beautiful enough, successful enough, exciting enough, for whatever our particular hang ups might be; forgiveness for 'others' too who have supposedly hurt us or done us wrong. 
In the end even forgiveness falls apart: we are the guilty and the innocent, the attacker and the victim, the repressor and the repressed, the judger and the judged, there is no 'other' to blame or to forgive.

In recognising that we are only ever meeting ourselves, closer than close, more intimate than intimate, the longing for something more dissolves, swallowed up in fathomless depths of love.

Then “so this is it?” is transformed from a glib mental complaint into a joyous celebration, exclamation, exultation of the magical wonderment of this eternal present... THIS IS IT!


ps/smoh



Saturday, December 28, 2013

The sky is not less blue because the blind man does not see it. In the kingdom of the blind, the one-eyed man is king..

If someone says that you are honest, 
it means that you are truthful, sincere, and morally upright. 

To boil it down to the simplest terms, being honest means that you are truthful – you tell the truth. 

Inevitably, whenever this discussion comes up, there are those who love to debate this issue and argue that truth is relative and that everyone has their own truth. 
While it may be true that everyone sees the truth from their own point of view, that is not proof that all truth is relative.

There is a Danish proverb which states,

 “The sky is not less blue because the blind man does not see it.” 

What this proverb means is that the truth do not change simply because someone sees it a certain way from his or her own point of view. 

Carl Frederick wrote, 
“The truth simply is that’s all. It does not need reasons: it does not have to be right: it’s just the truth. Period.”

ps/smoh

P/S
Perception is key, as is justification which one is true to the other depends on the situation and what one knows, or perceives even through an opinion, which also is just what it is , as is mine. 

Friday, December 27, 2013

Consciousness being and doing what it is and does. That's all folks!

The individual's unique life and experience is 'important' since it is essential and indispensable to the collective whole but it is the 'illusion' of total importance and primacy over all other life(s) that when seen by self and others as 'one's defining characteristic' defines 'the state and problem of ignorance'..
Ignorance caused by a natural preoccupation with self and obsessive focus on self-gratification of personal sensations, feelings and personal life experience.



ps/smoh

Thursday, December 26, 2013

You must start with the first step: the cleansing of the mind and the cultivation of virtue.

( •_•)
\) (> 
/ \  The first step has to be “the cleansing of the mind,” it makes perfect sense. If your goal is to cultivate moral excellence, you must first get rid of the things in your mind that will interfere with your goal; thus you must first cleanse the mind.

If you had a small patch of land and you wanted to cultivate a garden on that land, the first thing that you would need to do is to rid the land of grass and weeds. 

You do this so you can properly prepare the soil in order to plant the seeds that you want to grow. It would be ridiculous to simply go out and throw some garden seeds on the unprepared ground and expect them to thrive or to even grow. 
You have to prepare the soil first.

In the same way, you have to prepare your mind in order to plant the seeds of virtue that you want to grow. Hopefully you are working with some pretty good soil to begin with, but if not, don’t be discouraged. 

Anyone with the desire to change their life can do so, as long as you are willing to work at it.

ps/smoh

Wednesday, December 25, 2013

Your thoughts control your emotions and ultimately, your actions.....

Imagine that your mind is your garden and your thoughts are seeds which you plant. 
If you prepare the soil - your mind, plant the seeds that you want to grow correct thoughts, water those seeds focus on your correct thoughts, keep your garden weeded rid your mind of negative, dishonourable thoughts, and continue to faithfully tend to your garden be consistent with this process, those seeds will mature and you will harvest the fruits of your labour your thoughts will materialize.

Just like growing vegetables in your garden, this process takes time; it doesn’t happen overnight. No one plants a garden one day, then harvests vegetables the next day. 

It simply doesn’t work that way. 
It takes time and work for a seed to mature into a plant, and for the plant to produce fruit. 
Your mind works the same way. 
First you have to prepare the soil cleanse your mind and get your attitude right, then you have to plant the seeds the thoughts that you want to manifest.

Many people read about this process, get excited about the prospects of putting this technique into action, and then forget about it after a couple of days or weeks. 

This is like planting a garden, taking care of it for a few days and then forgetting about it or even worse, deciding that gardening doesn’t really work, digging the seeds up and throwing them away. 
Once you plant your seeds, you have to water your seeds and work to keep the weeds out of the garden so those seeds can grow.

If you don’t follow through by giving your garden water and fertilizer, and keeping the weeds from choking your plants, your garden will not produce the results that you want. 

This is not to say that your garden will not grow anything. 
If you leave it up to chance, you will find that your garden will have plants growing in it, but those plants will be undesirable plants such as noxious weeds, instead of the plants which produce useful, nutritious food that strengthen your mind and body.

This is how your mind works also. 

If you decide to mindfully take control of your thoughts in order to start manifesting the virtues and character traits that you desire, but you give up on the process after a couple of weeks or months, you will find that the mental weeds will overrun the garden of your mind. 
Any garden, no matter how beautiful, will regress to nothing more than a patch of weeds if it is not continually taken care of. 
It doesn’t matter how well established it may be or how long it has been growing, if the gardener quits tending to it, it will soon be overrun with weeds.

Controlling your thoughts and being mindful is a daily process. It is not an objective in which you achieve your goal and then move on to another project.


It is an ongoing, never-ending part of the lifestyle. The day you decide that you no longer have to be aware of your thoughts, is the day you start to regress. 

Hopefully by now you are starting to see why it is so important to be true to yourself and to pay attention to your thoughts.



ps/smoh

I want you real. I want you true. I want you now.

I want authentic relationships, with real people, having fun discussion, genuine connection and exchange. 

Don't be a sheep; don't care so much what I think of you. You are beautiful and unique – show it. 

Display integrity, be vulnerable, be direct, be open, it makes you much more interesting to be with. 

Have the courage to be true to yourself; there is no secret ingredient. 

It's just you.




ps/smoh

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Weak people seek revenge. Strong people forgive. Intelligent people ignore....Wisdom of an elder ^__*

There is a big difference between seeking revenge and avenging a wrong done. While these two may seem the same to those who don't know, they aren't. 
Revenge is seeking to getting even for personal reasons, for something that personally hurt YOU. 
That is vastly different than avenging a wrong done to someone you love in order to make it right and see that justice is done. 
I know it sounds like the same thing, but it isn't.

Revenge is a selfish act, while avenging a wrong done to a loved one is an act of love, you aren't doing it for yourself but rather for someone else who was taken advantage of and abused.

Neither of these acts require you to continue to hold onto the wrong that was done. When you do that, you only hurt yourself more. 

By holding on to unforgiveness, you are allowing the other person to continually defeat you in your mind. You must always forgive, then ignore.

It takes a lot to forgive some low-life that has greatly wronged you. That is why this quote states that strong people forgive. 

But notice, it didn't say intelligent people forget. It is not wise to forget. Remember what was done and who this person truly is, but don't let it plague your mind.

This is why it is intelligent to IGNORE, not forget. 

If you forget, you are just setting yourself up to learn the same lesson again. 
Remember the lesson you have learned, but ignore the situation so it doesn't constantly plague your mind.

ps/smoh


Monday, December 23, 2013

A bitter woman complains that all men are the same. A wise woman stops choosing men on looks alone and starts looking deeper into a man's true character.

We all have to deal with the consequences of our decisions and our actions. 
This is not being taught to people today, thus they make careless decisions, thinking only of the moment, not the ongoing consequences of their actions. 
People must learn to think ahead. 
Think rationally about your choices before you act.

When you change the way you think, you will change your decisions and your actions, and the consequences that you have to deal with as well. 

If you don't like your current life, it is time to look at your past choices. 
When you change your thoughts and your choices, you change your life. 

ps/smoh


Sunday, December 22, 2013

Face it. Your life is never going to work out.

Hallelujah.

That is, the story of your life is always going to be imperfect. That's the nature of story - always incomplete, always searching for a conclusion, always bound to time and change. 
In the movie of your life, thing won't always go according to plan. People won't always understand you. They will mishear, misquote, and misrepresent you. 
They will form their own idea and opinion of you, no matter how clearly you try to represent yourself. Your success can turn to failure. Your wealth can turn to poverty. 
The ones you love can leave you. Problems that get fixed can lead to new problems. No matter how much you have, you can have more, or lose more. 
It's never going to work out in the story of "my life".

And even if it does work out, whatever that means to you, you will still be here, in this moment, now. This is the only place where things can 'work out', if they ever do. 

And in fact, things have already worked out, beyond the story. For in this moment, there is no goal, no image of perfection, no comparison, no 'should' or 'should not', and the thoughts, sensations, feelings, sounds and smells appearing right now are entirely appropriate, wonderfully fitting, beautifully timely, and totally welcome, for this moment in the movie. 

Without a script, how can this moment be wrong? Without a plan, how can life not go according to plan?

Realising that your life is never going to work out, and that it cannot ever work out, and that it isn't supposed to work out, is the greatest relief, and brings the greatest ease, drawing you deeply into the sacredness of things as they actually are. 


Your life may be an imperfect mess, but it is an imperfect mess that is perfectly divine - a work of sacred art, even if you forget that sometimes. 

Humiliation turns to humility in the space of just a heartbeat, and all that's left is to fall on your knees with gratitude for what is given, and what has not yet been taken away.

ps/smoh

Saturday, December 21, 2013

Where does suffering go when we are not thinking about it?

For that matter, where does our sense of self go when we are not thinking about that?
They are not there.
This is not a trick or an example of denial.
It's a clue.
Aside from thought, there is no self and no suffering.

What we are is beyond or prior to thought.? 
We are that in which thought arises and passes away with its fantasies of self and suffering.

 I was thinking today about animals and they manage just fine without symbols and concepts. And they don't seem to get that hung up on pain either.

The only knowing of self is actually "nothingness". 

All that you may think you are but really aren't...keeps you reeling under all kinds of effects, and sufferings!!! Neither this....nor that!! or..... 
Not this! 
Not this!!..... 
Neti! Neti! Neti!!

Knowledge is the mindful impetus of a suffering being. 
The movement of be to being, present and future, and space and time; all arise in the thought that we can creatively or conceptually know the unknown. 
Thought is not truth because it changes, but it becomes the subjective reality upon which we place our sense of value.

ps/smoh

Friday, December 20, 2013

THOUGHTS WITHOUT A THINKER....

“In relative reality, thoughts have tremendous power. Thoughts collapse the quantum wave of near-infinite possibilities and bring the subject of those thoughts into manifestation. Powerful thoughts arise, but there is no thinker anywhere to be found.”

Response to Comments:
Relative reality" was a poor choice of words. I am pointing towards life as it is lived in duality. But everything arises and passes away within Awareness, so there really is only the ultimate reality of nondual presence.
Sorry.
As for the thinker, well, that really is the crux of the matter, isn't it?
This was the ultimate realization of the Buddha and of every other sage in history. There is no self. When you try to find the thinker, all you come up with is individual thoughts, perceptions, and feelings.
There is no subject or entity that can be found. Its presence is ASSUMED, but not actual. Thoughts, feelings, and perceptions simply occur. But they do not occur to ANYONE.
The easiest way to confirm this in your own experience is to notice what happens to the "assumed person" or “you” or the “thinker” when there are no thoughts occurring in the mind.
What will probably be noticed is that when there are no thoughts, there is also no person or entity. But because the mind is so rarely free of thought, this fact of the absence of a thinker is usually not noticed.
 Now, why make such a big deal out of the absence of the thinker?
Because it is the assumed existence of the separate self that is the source of all suffering, doubt, and questioning.
All of these things begin to fade away and lose their power when the idea of the self is challenged and found empty.
This is not a doctrine or belief, although many “nondualists” or “neo-advaitins” turn it into a dogmatic statement without having done the requisite noticing. It is only valuable when noticed directly.
So please don’t take my word for ANY of this. Don’t accept or reject it on intellectual or logical grounds. If you think you are a self or a thinker, fine.
I would just suggest that you not take it for granted that you are, but actually prove it one way or another in direct experience.

Pause thought for a moment and see what happens to “you.”

^__^

ps/smoh

Thursday, December 19, 2013

Death is only the beginning <- dunno what that means but it sounds cool when I picture Morgan Freeman saying it ....

You are going to die no matter what.
If you don't do what you love, you are just doing what you wish you could stop doing so you can do what you love.
If you don't know what you love, then at least know what you don't love and stop doing that.
If you want to be loved, get a Time magazine subscription so you'll have something to do while you wait. I recommend loving though, because it saves on the subscription and the waiting.
Above all else, fully understand death is indifferent to the outcome of the story of "my life" and rich people die every day.

Life and death "and the seasons they go round and round and the painted ponies they go up and down."

The realisation that I'M DYING, is a gift.
Not dying in a few years or maybe sometime, but RIGHT NOW!
My reaction was “I can't die now I haven't done what I need to do"
^__^ you have to find out what the most important thing to do is…and find it out quick.

Yea,  we are all going to die, and when I die I will know I enjoyed myself as much as I could , no regrets.
I know it's been used a billion times, but apropos here:
“Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming "

Wow!
What a Ride!”

ps/smoh

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Synchronicities are not flukes or random events, they’re intentional reflections of our intuition working with the perfect order of all things in the unseen world.

( •_•)
\) (> 
/ \ Seek truth with all your heart, mind, soul, and body. 
But don't get too good at it and don't take too much pleasure from the spiritual marketplace or you might get stuck in the process of seeking for the rest of your life
Great and accomplished seekers rarely become "finders."
And isn't that the point of the journey...to come to a point of utter frustration that you have never achieved the glorious awakening you were expecting?
The earth didn't move and you didn't see God and the angels didn't announce your achievement.
But in that moment of despair and abject surrender, you may just realize the one truth that every avatar and sage has been pointing to for thousands of years:
THAT for which you seek is THAT which is doing the seeking.
All my life I valued Truth.
There is a new Paradigm in my life...Love...Love is alive and everywhere and every thing....no seeking.




ps/smoh


Monday, December 16, 2013

Pride is concerned with WHO is right. Character is concerned with WHAT is right.

The above statements seem to be the same at first glance. After all, they are both are concerned with being right, right? 
Not exactly. 
There is a big difference between being concerned with WHO is right, as opposed to WHAT is right.

The first statement argues over WHO is right, with little concerned to what is actually right. 

This is all about pride. 
Don't worry about WHO is right, be concerned with WHAT is right. 
All that matters is what is right, not saving face or saving your pride.

If you have the character to focus on what is right, the WHO is right, will take care of itself. 


Be humble and let justice be your guide. 




ps/smoh

Sunday, December 15, 2013

A Ballet Of The Soul

I see life as a ballet of the soul. In spite of crisis, boredom, ennui, tragedy, grace of the soul is being danced across the ages. 
It is an eternal rhythm that is subtly experienced. Believe it or not, this dance is not done by anyone that we know ourselves to be. 
It is the part of us that is immanent and transcendent. It knows nothing of sweat or toil. It’s only job is to express what IT is. 
And what it is is grace beyond measure.

We sit at the table drinking coffee and ruing what we did or didn’t do. 
We go to sleep and wake with aching heads and remember bad dreams. 
We don’t know how we got here or when we will leave. 
And the dance is happening. 
We work and rest and act the part we have been given to play.

And the dance changes step and rhythm and lifts us up over the fog and lets us see the stars.
And when the dance needs a partner it finds one. 
And then it may leave that partner at the altar or by some violent act. 
And we denounce the dance. 

Indeed the mystery of the dance is that it is anonymous. 

No one there can claim to be anything but a dancer of what is the dance of life. 

And all too soon a silence falls upon the floor. 
And then it is that the dance begins on another stage in another universe. 
We sigh and go on. 
And then once again we find ourselves taken up by a new rhythm. 
And the dance finds us a new partner. 
And so it goes.

ps/smoh

Saturday, December 14, 2013

Protecting yourself is self-defence. Protecting others is warriorship.....

Many people consider themselves to be warriors just because they have spent time training in a dojo and have learned how to fight. 
They feel that they can protect themselves against almost any attacker. Having developed their skills to the max, they walk around with the self-confidence of a lion, just waiting for some poor soul to make the mistake of harassing them in a bar or on the street. 
They feel without a shadow of a doubt that they can protect themselves, but does this really make them a warrior?

Protecting yourself is self-defence by the very definition of the term. Being a warrior means much more than being able to protect yourself. 
It means being willing and able to protect others as well as yourself. Warriors feel a sense of duty to protect those around them where the ordinary man only feels the need to protect himself and get out of Dodge. 
There is a big difference in the two.

The willing to put one well-being on the line for those one loves or for those under one protection. Many times, one put their well being ahead of one's own. We could easily defend ourselves and leave the danger behind, but we chooses the path of chivalry and warriorship.

We know there is a difference between self-defence and warriorship, and we also knows that the lifestyle that we has chosen demands that we put our warrior ideals over simple self-interest. 

Protecting yourself is self-defence; protecting others is warriorship.

ps/smoh




Friday, December 13, 2013

Little minds are too much hurt by little things; great minds see all these things too, but are not hurt by them. La Rochefoucauld

Don’t allow every little thing that others say or do affect you. Be above the petty words and actions of others. You have much more important things to focus your attention on than these minor annoyances. 

Keep your concentration on your ultimate objectives and you will find that you neither have the time nor the interest to address minor, irrelevant things, much less allow them to actually hurt your feelings. 
You have to realize that these little things do not matter.

When I first started writing, I was constantly attacked in writing by those who disagreed with what I wrote. Many of these people were extremely rude and tactless in their approach, especially those who hid behind their computer screen and attacked me online. 


At first this would bother me and get me worked up, but as I began to realize the truth in this quote, their attacks became completely meaningless. 
In fact, they actually became a source of humour and kept me entertained for a brief second before I deleted them.

What you have to consider, when it comes to other people, is that not all opinions matter. I know, this may sound elitist, but it is the truth. 

It doesn’t matter what some half-wit says about my writing. The only opinions that matter are those which come from wise men who know what they are talking about. 

Would an alligator’s opinion about how to acquire food in the Arctic matter to a polar bear? 

Not really, because the polar bear would know that the alligator doesn’t have a clue about his native environment.

ps/smoh



Thursday, December 12, 2013

Drunk words are sober thoughts.

Many times when people overindulge in drink, their protective walls come down and they are not as careful concerning what they say. They will say things that they normally wouldn't say. 
Basically, they quit editing their thoughts and just say what they think.

What you have to determine is whether or not they are speaking from their heart or just plain drunk and babbling. The sages taught that drunk words are sober thoughts, meaning that those who drink too much start to make their true thoughts known, instead of keeping them hidden, when they overindulge. 


Another way to phrase this bit of wisdom is that words spoken when drunk are the person's true feelings.

Either way, the wise man will not overindulge to the point of letting his guard down and saying things which are better off not said. 

Keep your wits about you, especially when you are away from home. Don't overindulge, and if you do, don't do so to the point of not being able to control your thoughts and your tongue.

At the same time, pay attention to what those around you say when they are drunk. You may just find out some "inside information" which they have been keeping locked away from you. 


Always remember, drunk words are sober thoughts.

ps/smoh





Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Yes, even though the quest was futile, it was not in vain.

All forms of seeking, whether religious, spiritual, materialistic, political, or fame-based, are the finite creations of a finite perspective - the ego. 

As such, these "ego projects" are doomed to failure in that they can never achieve their ultimate and largely unconscious goals of controlling life, defeating death, and awakening the Seeker to Truth. 

But it is the very futility of ego projects that are their greatest asset to those who come to the awareness that seeking is no longer needed. 

In the face of the abject failure of our ego projects to provide what we believe we lack, need, and/or want, we have the opportunity to see that we have never lacked anything substantial or essential. 

All that we seek has always been within. In other words, we ALWAYS ALREADY ARE that which we seek. In this way, the exhaustion of our ego project and the despair that follows can be a deep moment of grace and the beginning of wisdom. 
In that moment, all seeking drops away forever and life appears in all its fullness and mystery.

In the meantime, seek with all your heart, mind, and soul. Kind of like Captain Kirk feeding a paradox to the computer in order to blow it up, thereby stopping the self-destruct sequence.

ps/smoh