The Way to go Willow Waddell!!!!

You feel your way through healing...not think your way through healing.

Real presence comes through the open heart. You cannot heal and resolve your emotional material with your mind. Your emotional material does not evaporate because you watch it. You can only heal your heart with your heart.

I appreciate the value of looking at the question of whether my judgements about another are a reflection of parts of me that I don’t like and that I want to deny. 

Sometimes they are. 

At the same time, let’s not throw reality out with the bath water. 

Sometimes our judgements are actually reflections of a conscious discernment process- we dislike certain qualities, actions, and an absence of integrity- for legitimate reasons. 

The “mirror defence” your reaction to another is merely a reflection back to you was likely invented by gurus who wanted to get away with inappropriate behaviour. 

There is a meaningful difference between unconscious judgements and conscious discernment.

A useful distinction is to ask if we are being triggered by the other person's actions or qualities. If it's conscious discernment, we won't be triggered, merely informed.

It depends on whether are casting judgement on particular behaviours, on on the totality of another individual. 

I find it quite reasonable to assert that a particular behaviour is destructive and harmful. Often, however, people totally write off the person who engages in that behaviour with a blanket judgement:

"all she ever cares about is she",

"he's just a rotten person",

"and she’s a total narcissist".

I find that such blanket judgements are never accurate. The essence of a human being can never be summed up in such a simplistic manner. 

Such judgements also by their very nature impose a false sense of separation and superiority which is ultimately an illusion since we are one.

A little knowledge is a dangerous thing. 

We need to pay attention and look within ourselves with humility but sometimes the judgements we feel reflect what our values are not just our faults.

Conscious discernment comes with compassion and no necessity to act on it unless it's a gross injustice? 

Yet, that can also be an excuse for many reasons.

The important thing is to look at our judgements and really get under them and understand them. 

Some are based on our own crap even though they seem reasonable and are excuses to avoid growth and intimacy. 

And no matter how you cut it, they could me a mountain of unknown suffering underneath the habits or qualities you are seeing in another that need deep compassion and understanding. 

This is what makes the difference between a conscious way of being and staying unconscious in many ways. 

To see with our hearts what we cannot possibly see with our minds, knowing that some people are sent to challenge us in this way, to love them anyway. 

And some are sent so we can choose to say NO.

The difference between discernment and judgement it’s a fine line to determine.

ps/smoh

And sometimes that armour/blanket is called "denial"...

Our survival adaptations are so tough, but our wounds are so delicate.

To heal, we have to lift the armour carefully- it saved our lives, after all. 

It’s like moving your best friend off to the side of the path. 

You don’t trample on her; you don’t hit her with a sledgehammer. 

You honour her presence like a warm blanket that has kept you safe and sound during wintry times. 

And then, when the moment is right, you get inside and stitch your wounds with the thread of love, slowly and surely, not rushing to completion, nurturing as you weave, tender and true. 

The healing process has a heart of its own, moving at its own delicate pace. We are such wondrous weavers...

It is one way of appreciating how even, or perhaps especially, when we are at our weakest we truly are courageous enough, wise enough to create such armour. 

Rather than berating ourselves for having created a defence system, 

perhaps we can honour the courage of that moment, and 

compliment it with another courageous moment of awareness and 

gentle release of the armour to the extent we are capable of in this moment.

At the end of the day it boils down to the fact that the only thing you take with you when you die is your human experience, the following came to mind. 

Life is the creative expression of the soul

ps/smoh

Sometimes, when the machinations of the unhealthy self-concept and the distractions of the day fall away,
I find myself overcome, overwhelmed, and thoroughly flooded with love- for this bloody birth, for this courageous humanity, for this perpetual breath.

I find myself brought right down to my knees, tearfully prayerful before this dance of sacred imagination.

I find myself looking through a lens that transcends and includes my localized meanderings, one that sees through the veils to the wonder of this sweet birth.

May gratitude soften the blows and lift us beyond the tight places.

May we all realize how beautiful this life is before our eyes close on this incarnation?

ps/smoh

Never do anything against conscience even if state demands it. Albert Einstein

The person of integrity can be trusted to do what is right because he answers first and foremost to his conscience. 
He does not look to others to justify his actions. 
He makes his decisions according to the firm, but not rigid, principles by which he lives. 
It is this dedication to his principles that enables him to live a life of excellence and which sets him above the common man.

Without personal integrity, it would be impossible to truly live. 

You will find that the lifestyle is not a passive lifestyle. It takes dedication and hard work. It takes self-discipline and perseverance. 
There will be many times when it would be easier for you to relax your standards and let some of your principles slide, times when no one would know but yourself.

The only thing that will keep you on track during times like that is your personal integrity and dedication to the principles that you have made a firm decision to live by on your journey to live. 

Thomas Jefferson explained how he dealt with such situations stating, “Whenever you are to do a thing, though it can never be known but to yourself, ask yourself how you would act were all the world looking at you, and act accordingly.”

Living with integrity has to be a 24/7 process, even when you are alone. 
To do right only when others are watching or listening, and live another way when you are alone, is merely being hypocritical. 

The intelligent person does not need the promise of Heaven to see the merit in good deeds.

Which do you think is more pure and more noble, doing a good deed in search of recognition and reward, or doing a good deed from your desire to truly help someone? 

There is virtue in sincerity. 

When you give of your time or money to help someone else, do it out of the goodness of your heart, not to position yourself for some selfish reason.

Give in order to help people, to help other beings, and to make our world a better place, not for personal gain. While there is nothing wrong with personal gain, there is a time and a place for everything.

Whatever you do, do it with a sincere heart and the correct attitude. 

The energy you send out will come back to you.

ps/smoh

If people could just come together to understand each other this could be understood and judgements could be released.

Anger isn't nice. It is a mask for bitter pain because of the fear to be open.

When and why did a human society of the people species decide that this is a bad thing to simply admit pain?

For fear of weakness for fear of not being good enough?

Well of course a person being a person is good enough, admitting the pain and just relieving it in a healthy manner so it actually will then be exited from self completely or as much as humanly possible, instead of it being suppressed.

There is nothing to fear of being open. In order to be open a person must be positive within their very own heart.

Just as passive aggressiveness causes suffering, so does passive non-aggressiveness. Passive aggression

Hurts those who fall victim to its misdirected arrows.

Passive non-aggressiveness wounds those who bottle up their expression- their anger congealing into a cache of weapons that explode internally.

The healthier approach is to learn how to express anger healthily and in a timely manner, so that it do not turn outward and harm innocents,and so that it would not turn inward and cause disease.

Because of all the horrible things that humans have done in anger, anger has been given a bad name. 

But it is a legitimate emotion that signals that someone has been violated.

It’s time we raised healthy anger back to the rafters of acceptability, and worked together to clarify a way of expressing it that both holds everyone safe AND allows us to honour its inherent wisdom.

Not abusing self or other, but seeing the feelings all the way through to the healing and lessons they contain.

Aggressiveness is a distorted form of life force... we need to learn to give it back its inherent qualities by using it timely and wisely.

It is a tricky one, that ego is under the surface brooding, bad ego wants revenge wants them to feel the pain they caused us, very challenging not to Respond in this way as it is NATURAL. 

But we are SUPERNATURAL, so we should not / do not let the animal ego dominate our actions and feelings not let bad ego out of the cage.

The only way is to KILL that ego that wants to repay/hurt because of a hurt, if that is the motivation it is challenging since it is often buried almost in our subconscious mind and appears at the worst times when it sees or feels "opening" to repay.

ps/smoh

To pacify or control an opponent without fighting is the greatest of skills. It takes a lot of discipline and confidence to swallow our pride in order to pacify some rude, aggressive, bitter person who you would rather lay out on the floor. 

But, as a warrior that I am, it is one of those things which I have to discipline to do and did it.
"Perfection is attained by slow a degree which requires the hand of time."

Namaste *__^

CHOOSE to live!!

We bury it because we have to. 

We are too young and it is too much to feel. 

But we forget that we are stronger now. 

We can handle the unearthing, the revealing, and the healing. 

And we have to so that we can live fully integrated lives. 

Everything has to come up for air. 

By breathing it back to life, we come back to life, 

Fullness of feeling, free to live again. 

It is SO challenging. 

It boils beneath the armour we built to survive. Before it can safely surface, defences must be gently dismantled. 

Otherwise, it's explosive. 

Let the unearthing begin! You can handle whatever comes up! You can! 

Face the lack of love, abandonment, abuse, neglect, betrayal now feel the pain don’t bury it under years of refusing to look hard and long at it in a dark night of Soul, 

Rather try being brutally honest with yourself and your feeling, look too see what is buried within, and what you find when you dare face it. 

But this time, it’s not with the mind of a child, but a wise adult, knowing whatever that darkness was that tried to form an image of you, in your soul as a child - 

be it from friends,

family, 

relatives, 

peers, 

teachers, 

even from a neglectful fallen human parent - MOM or DAD, 

If you are free in God, you realize you are not bad, and that image formed in you, is and was not and is NOT THE REAL YOU, but rather a dark force that hated you before you were born... working through fallen beings, it is a force not within but without you, it is outside of you.

You ARE stronger now... Now is the time. To unearth, examine, own and be accountable for, embrace and transmute. And BE FREE.

I look people in the eye again and through their eyes into their soul and through their soul I recognize my soul! 

And the beauty is that I see it happening a split second before it actually happens and I act upon it, fearlessly and conscious of the fact that it is happening! 

Now that is freedom, which is life which comes barging in at full strength!

We are in our own power now, we get to CHOOSE! 

No one to blame, no one to point fingers at. We are divine beings having a human experience, we made the choices that led us directly to THIS PLACE, and if we don't like it there are different choices to be MADE!

You’re either in, or you’re out. 

Sometimes it’s that simple. No more stories, no more sidestepping, escape hatches, veiled retreats. You’re either in, or you’re out. 

Peace  Love and light!!!!

ps/smoh

My precious best friend is my brain!

We fall down, we get up. We get up, we fall down. 

We either see our stumbles as examples of our own victim, we are being abused by the universe or as opportunities for self-creation embracing life’s challenges as essential lessons from the Godself within. 

The gift of falling down there’s gold in them there spills. 

Stumbling toward ecstasy we made it through because we are needed here. 

We are each here to uncover and honour profound reasons for being. 

We are each here as part of the sacred dance, stepping on each other’s toes and turning each other toward God, one clumsy step after another. 

Although the ultimate romance is with your own soul, it is our experiences together that give birth to the essential lessons. 

Every sacred purpose is a buried treasure, essential to the advancement of the collective soul. 

If we get off the dance floor, we postpone others’ lessons too. as one who has in recent years travelled back to find out who some of my souls past have been, may I say the lessons become more clear, the desire to reach more heightened. 

I once thought, as an adoptee, my blood line would answer my early deeply felt questions and when I was gifted the story of my birthright, I was left with an awareness that it was SO much more. 

Thanks for keeping the rhetoric flowing, allowing others to know it is all sacred, gifted from birth, a reason we are here no doubt, each individual with a different purpose, but most definitely, purpose, a journey of many realms to travel and seek...self and its connections to life. 

The beauty of the repetition of the pattern is that the configuration has changed . 

With the tool we now have at our disposal to see the pattern and using the tool of configuration to change the pattern that we slipped right back into.

ps/smoh